What to write in a new home card

People move house in a state of exhaustion and mild financial terror. A new home card does best when it is warm and asks nothing of them — no questions about the mortgage, no offers that need answering. Wish them well in the place, say you’d like to see it when they are ready, and leave it there.

Warm

Friendly, unfussy, safe with almost anybody.

• Welcome home! Hope it’s everything you wanted.
• Congratulations on the new place. Many happy years in it.
• Here’s to the first cup of tea in the new kitchen.
• Congratulations! Can’t wait to see it.
• Wishing you every happiness in the new house.

Funny

A joke with affection behind it. Read the room first.

• Congratulations. Only four hundred boxes to go.
• New home! May your wifi connect on the first attempt.
• Congratulations on becoming a person who talks about guttering.
• Welcome home. The smoke alarm will start beeping at 3am; it is tradition.
• Congratulations. You now own a drill and no idea where it is.

Heartfelt

For the people you would actually say this to out loud.

• Congratulations. I hope this is the house where the good years happen.
• Wishing you a home full of noise, friends and very long dinners.
• Welcome home. May it be a kind place to come back to.
• So pleased for you both. You’ve worked hard for this.
• Congratulations — here’s to filling it with the people you love.

Simple

When short is the right answer, and it often is.

• Congratulations on your new home!
• Welcome home.
• Happy housewarming.
• Wishing you every happiness in the new place.
• Congratulations — enjoy it.

What to avoid

• Don’t ask what they paid, or comment on the area’s prices.
• Don’t offer to help with the move after the move has happened.
• Don’t mention the work it needs, even admiringly.
• Don’t ask when the housewarming is. They have unpacked nothing.