What to write in a thank you card

A thank you card has one job: name the thing. “Thank you for the lovely gift” is a form; “thank you for the pan — I have used it every day since” is a thank you. If someone did you a favour rather than giving you an object, say what it made possible. That is the sentence people keep.

Warm

Friendly, unfussy, safe with almost anybody.

• Thank you, truly. It made more difference than you know.
• Just a note to say thank you — it was so kind of you.
• Thank you for this. It was exactly the right thing at the right moment.
• I’m very grateful. Thank you for thinking of me.
• Thank you — you didn’t have to, and I’m glad you did.

Funny

A joke with affection behind it. Read the room first.

• Thank you. I would say you shouldn’t have, but I’m delighted you did.
• Thank you! It has already been used, possibly too much.
• I’m writing a thank you card, which is how you know I mean it.
• Thank you. You have set a dangerously high standard.
• Thank you — I will be accepting further kindness at any time.

Heartfelt

For the people you would actually say this to out loud.

• Thank you. You helped when it would have been easier not to, and I haven’t forgotten.
• I don’t think you realise how much that meant. Thank you.
• Thank you for being the person who showed up. It mattered.
• I’m lucky to know you. Thank you for all of it.
• Thank you — for the thing itself, and for the thought behind it.

Simple

When short is the right answer, and it often is.

• Thank you so much.
• Thank you — it was very kind of you.
• With thanks, and love.
• Thank you for everything.
• Grateful for you. Thank you.

What to avoid

• Don’t apologise for the card being late at the start. Thank them first, apologise briefly at the end if at all.
• Don’t be vague about what you are thanking them for. The detail is the whole card.
• Don’t promise to return the favour. It turns a gift into a debt.
• Don’t use “just wanted to say” — it shrinks the thing you are saying.